They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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