I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize