I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
