i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
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you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
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I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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