fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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