the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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