They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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