We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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