end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Randomize
