how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
