Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
you traded sex for a burrito?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
