The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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