To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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