i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
