How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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