His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
