I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
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