Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
he had hair everywhere except his balls
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize
