***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
