That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
