when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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