Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were destined to go to rehab together
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize