it hurts more in the daytime
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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