so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
My breasts were aching with rage.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
