i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
