Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
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We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
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You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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