At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Randomize
