I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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