Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
my liver is dry heaving
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
