fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
