chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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