You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
