Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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