I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
