don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize