No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
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