is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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