I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
