I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize