Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
