How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
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