I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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