Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
