chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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