i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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