windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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