i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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