Someone shit on the floor
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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