Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
