12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
